


Three Wishes

by BookshopLaura



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-21
Updated: 2014-10-12
Packaged: 2018-02-18 07:26:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2340062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BookshopLaura/pseuds/BookshopLaura
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Arthur, Merlin, Angst, Magic reveal and a little broken jug that grants 3 wishes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It just looks like an ordinary ceramic jug to Arthur, however much the rather dirty looking peasant who had pressed it into his hands as they left the city one day had insisted it was special, even going so far as to suggest it could grant him wishes. He had frowned at her and pointedly reminded her that magic was banned in Camelot. She had just looked straight back and said 

“Everyone needs a little magic sometime, your majesty” She’d looked harmless enough and Arthur only turned around to make sure nothing before warning her again, but when he turned back she was gone. He’d straightened and looked around frowning. It was suspicious but the city gate area was flooded with people and she could easily have darted into the crowd. He had looked down at the jug in his hand then. It was honestly pretty poor, typical peasant tableware; it even had a chip in the top. She probably had a stockpile of them and flogged them to unsuspecting passers-by who. Risky but probably worthwhile if you could convince someone they were worth something.  
He’s not sure why he keeps hold of it. It clearly doesn’t have any actual magical properties, and he has no intention of prosecuting the desperate peasant trying to make a few coins, but he does keep hold of it. He puts it down on a cupboard by the door when he gets back to his chambers and forgets about it for a while. 

\---

It’s a few weeks later and Arthur is talking to Merlin, leaning against that cupboard. Merlin is leaning against the cupboard too, and it occurs to Arthur that they’re standing quite close together. He reddens slightly at the thought but then Merlin says something. Some jibe about one of the knights and Arthur’s laughing, probably a little longer and louder than the joke deserved. But he doesn’t care. Merlin’s smile is beaming and his eyes seem to dance and Arthur feels like a moth before a flame. Before he realises it he’s glancing down to look at Merlin’s lips, then back up to his eyes. Merlin returns the look, and glances down himself and suddenly Arthur’s heart is racing because it seems like the urge to gently stoke Merlin’s face, to lean in and kiss him is unbearable. He feels wrong footed, like he’s not sure where the feeling has come from. So he’s straightening up and saying something about Merlin finishing his chores then going to bed and looking anywhere but Merlin, who awkwardly says yes and practically runs from the room. 

As soon as the door closes Arthur is leaning heavily on the cupboard, his head on his arms. He doesn’t know what he’s doing, doesn’t understand. Merlin is his servant, is a man, and can be incredibly frustrating. In the cold light of day these are three very good reasons to not be attracted to him. And yet he was. He’d been within seconds of kissing him. He looks up, resting his chin on his hand as he thought. His eyes fall on the little chipped jug sitting dusty on the cupboard. Of course Merlin hasn’t got around to clearing it away. He smiles a little at that, and then sobers. He reaches forward and gently holds in, rubbing the glazed side with his thumb.  
She had said that it would grant him wishes, which was just ridiculous. And even if it did he wouldn't know what to wish. He picks it up and carries it towards his bed, rubbing it absent-mindedly. Lying back on his bed he really wishes he knew how he felt about Merlin. 

\---

It’s only a week later and Arthur is lying on his bed without any doubt in his mind about how he feels about Merlin. He loves Merlin; he’s head over heels in love with him, and definitely likes kissing him. Especially when Merlin is kissing him so enthusiastically. Running his fingers through Merlin’s hair he thinks he’ll never tire of the feeling of Merlin smiling as he kisses him. Merlin pulls back a little. 

“I should be getting lunch.” He’s breathless and his cheeks are red and eyes blown wide. His lips hang inches from Arthur’s, tempting, teasing.

“I think I’m your king and you should do what I wish and I want you kissing me.” He says, wrapping both his hands round Merlin’s back and pulling down onto him so they’re chest to chest. Merlin gasps into the next kiss, but doesn't protest any further, his eyes fluttering shut. If Arthur thinks about the jug at all, he thinks it’s coincidence. Happy, blissful coincidence. 

\---

It has been 3 months, 1 week and a day, and Arthur can honestly say that he has never been happier. He still hasn't worked out exactly how to make this work with him being king and needing heirs, but he knows he’ll think of something. In the meanwhile if it’s possible he’s been spending even more time with Merlin.  
But although he treasures every minute, something is nagging at him. As talkative and open as Merlin is, as bright as he smiles, Arthur senses something deeper. Merlin is keeping something from him and Arthur doesn't like it. He doesn't know why either. He’s tried to let Merlin know how much he cares, how he can trust Arthur, no matter what the secret, but Merlin won’t budge.  
That night as he sits by his bed, he finds himself drawn again to the little chipped jug. He rubs the side absentmindedly as he wishes he knew what Merlin’s secret is.


	2. Chapter 2

Arthur lays on his bed, fully dressed with Merlin curled up against him. Thank fully he’s kicked his boots off, and he keeps nuzzling into Arthur’s side. Arthur caresses him by rubbing circles in his back, and now and then plants a kiss on top of his head. But Merlin seems tense. Like he wants to say something, but can’t decide if he should. It tugs at Arthur’s heart, it worries him.  
  
“You can tell me, you know.” Says Arthur quietly. He feels Merlin tense a little under him.  
  
“Tell you what, Arthur?” asks Merlin. If Merlin wasn’t lying in his arms, if Arthur hadn’t been watching for it, he probably would have accepted it. That alone makes his heart skip. How long has Merlin been holding onto this.  
  
“Your secret” whispers Arthur, and tugs Merlin into him a bit more.  
  
“Arthur, I don’t...” Merlin starts, sitting up to look at Arthur, but Arthur silences him with a finger to his lips.  
  
“Don’t. I know you do, but... Merlin you can trust me.” It’s like a mask is lifted away as Merlin looks at Arthur. Because Merlin is looking at him, eyes wide, eyebrows furrowing in worry and he’s chewing his lip. He’s actually afraid of what Arthur will think.  
  
“Good God, Merlin. You can! You know you can!” says Arthur, sitting up a little.  
  
“I...” stammers Merlin, his eyes seem to beg Arthur not to do this. To let it go and forget about it. But Arthur needs to know. He loves Merlin. He leans forward, cupping Merlin’s jaw and stroking Merlin’s cheek with his thumb.  
  
“Merlin, please. It doesn’t matter what it is. I prom...” Now it’s Merlin’s finger which silences Arthur.  
  
“Don’t promise! You can’t... you don’t know!” Merlin’s voice cracks and a tear runs down his cheek, which Arthur wipes away, his heart hammering. Can it really be that bad?  
  
Merlin hasn’t removed his finger, and he looks like he wants to say something so desperately. But he’s also trying so hard to keep it in, so the secret is tearing Merlin apart from the inside out. Merlin’s eyes close and Arthurs thinks he’s going to say something, but he doesn’t. Then turns away, looking sadly down at the bed, then down at his own hands. Arthur places his own either side of them, hoping.  
  
For a moment Arthur waits, on edge. Merlin mutters something and Arthur is just about to ask him to speak up when his eyes catch sight of the two blue butterflies that have appeared on Merlin’s hand. They seem to glow and begin to flutter rising up. Arthur’s eyes follow them until his eyes meet Merlin’s still glowing gold.  
  
Arthur springs back off of the bed, as if the touch of Merlin’s hands has scolded him.  
  
“Arthur, I...” starts Merlin, climbing from the bed to follow Arthur.  
  
“Shut up” says Arthur quietly, eyeing Merlin warily.  
  
“Arthur please!” Merlin’s eyes are wide and desperate.  
  
“Silence!” shouts Arthur. Merlin stops where he is, closes his mouth and looks down. He’s blinking a little, but Arthur barely registers it. He’s too busy thinking about when he does next. Call one of the guards? Have Merlin arrested? Executed? He glances across to where his sword lies against a chair in it’s scabbard. He could cut him down himself, right here and now. No one would blame him. Not when they knew the truth. Except he’d have no proof of Merlin’s guilt. Besides, Merlin isn’t actually attacking him. It’s one thing to slay a man in battle, when it’s you or them. But to cut a man down when he’s just standing before you. No, that is not Arthur.  
  
“Get out” he says with deadly calm. For a moment Arthur thinks Merlin might argue, but then he is walking, no running from the room. 

\---

Arthur’s mind is a battle ground. On the one hand his best friend, and for the last few months, his lover has is a traitor, a sorcerer. At the least it means that Merlin has lied to him for all the years they have know each other. But Arthur is not just Arthur, he’s the king and he has the kingdom to think of. Merlin is a potential threat. Who knows what he could be planning, what damage he has already wrought.  
  
He paces his room, thinking of all of the terrible, possible things that Merlin could be planning. And why he chose to tell Arthur now. He buries the possibility that it was out of love. Because he can’t afford that luxury.  
  
Having convinced himself that his kingdom is crumbling around him, and that he is surrounded by liars and traitors, Arthur heads to bed. Merlin is probably long fled by now and as king Arthur should care, but right now he’s too hurt to care. He sits down by his bed and he sees the little jug sitting unnoticed. He picks it up, rubbing it a little. He wishes he knew what Merlin had planned. And then because it might be magic, and because he can, he picks it up and throws it against the wall opposite him. Then, thinking he won’t sleep anyway, he climbs into bed.


	3. Chapter 3

Arthur wakes up. Or at least he thinks he wakes up. It doesn't feel awake, more like a dream, except that he's conscious. But if he was awake he wouldn't be watching himself taking to Merlin on his bed. Merlin is lying across him. Arthur watches himself staring at the ceiling trying to think of the what to say to Merlin. He half expects Merlin to be grinning evilly or looking annoyed because this is all just an act. But he isn't, he looks happy. He's nuzzling Arthur, whilst playing with a piece of loose thread on Arthur's shirt. He's smiling, not evilly and that grates on Arthur. Why is he happy?

And then the Arthur on the bed speaks and he can see the way Merlin's hand stills, freezes even. His eyes cloud. If Arthur wasn't so upset he'd say they were fearful, but no they are suspicious, guilty. And then he outright lies to Arthur. Looking up innocently. Arthur's yelling at him, shouting expletives that the Merlin lying in the other Arthur's arms can't hear. The Arthur on the bed is still rubbing circles in his back, and all Arthur wants to do is tell him the truth. Because he was clearly an idiot before, to draw someone he knows is a liar closer, physically. 

But then Merlin is pushing himself up and Arthur is looking at him and saying  
"You can trust me." And Arthur wants to carrying on yelling but even though he's anticipating it Merlin's look of fear disarms him and for a moment he stops. He pushes the feeling aside even as his alter ego on the bed is begging him to trust him. It's just an act. Merlin has lied to him all this time, of course he is play acting now. But then Merlin shocks him again. Because Merlin is placing his finger on Arthur's lips. Arthur stands watching shocked for a moment. Why would he do that? Why would he stop Arthur from making a promise? Because if he'd made a promise he might have felt compelled to uphold it. He might have been forced to forgive and accept Merlin. There must be another reason. Surely Merlin can't have been protecting his honour. 

Merlin's crying, and is still sitting with his finger on Arthur's lips. Then he's looking down. Arthur moves to watch Merlin's face even as Merlin focusses on his hands. Tears pour down face and his hands are shaking. He looks scared, looks sad. And then as the butterflies, which are beautiful, flutter upwards, Merlin slowly looks up. Is it a hopeful look? Arthur doesn't think he's daring to look hopeful. But then the Arthur on the bed is jumping away in shock, in disgust. It makes Arthur himself jump, but he tries to stay looking at Merlin. His face is desperate and shocked. For a moment his hands still sitting as they had been, shaking slightly. 

Then he gets up shakily. 

"Arthur, I..." his face shows more fear and uncertainty than his voice betrays. And Arthur, Arthur who is dreaming feels wrong-footed. Almost seasick. Because the Arthur that is him but isn't is angry and rightly so, but Merlin is afraid, so afraid. 

"Arthur please!" The sound of his voice seems to be forcing it's way into his heart. Arthur imagines it's similar to a mother hearing a child scream, it demands to be heard. It needs you. But the other Arthur silences him. And he's thinking and looking around. And then he obviously turns his head to the sword and scabbard and Arthur who is dreaming or not looks at Merlin. Looks at Merlin who is looking at the sword, his eyes wide but his mouth shut. Like this is inevitable. Like he knew this is how it might end. Like he expects Arthur to kill him. Arthur watches him in morbid fascination, not sure any more whether he hates Merlin or himself. Merlin keeps watching the swords, just waiting until the other Arthur says

"Get out." and Merlin looks up at him and then back at the sword for the moment and then practically runs from the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that this repeats the previous, but I hope you guys can see where this is going
> 
> \- and when I'm settled into my new job I will try and update more regularly.


	4. Chapter 4

Arthur goes to follow Merlin out of the room. Without thinking he finds himself walking through the door as it swings shut through him. He isn't real, or maybe this isn't real. Whatever is happening he can only see. It should have been obvious before, from the way Merlin and the other Arthur hadn't reacted, but having a door go through him seems to shock Arthur into the realisation. 

But then he's standing on the other side of the door and Merlin has stopped, has turned back towards the door again. Still the look of upset, of desperation is etched on Merlin's face. He steps forward. Seemingly studying the door, tentatively raising a hand for moment, before his face crumples in his hand drops. He takes a deep breath, a last lingering look, and the he practically sprints away. Arthur follows. He tells himself that it's purely for the means of discovering Merlin's plot. He can't admit to himself the way his heart had raced at Merlin's broken look. No, Merlin was only upset at the failure of his plan. Even now it seems half hearted. 

Merlin bursts through the doors into Gaius' chambers, now loudly sobbing, Arthur following him, making sure he's through the door before Merlin shuts it and collapses in tears against it. Gaius is on his feet in seconds.

"Merlin, my boy! What's happened?" He walks as quickly as he can over to where Merlin is now a curled ball on the floor. He kneels down stiffly, wrapping his arm Merlin's shoulders in a way that Arthur had longed his father to do many a time. For a few moments Merlin doesn't acknowledge it, doesn't say anything. Gaius just rubs his shoulders and gently asks.

"Merlin? Merlin, won't you tell me what's happened?"

"I... I told him." says Merlin quietly, desolately. Arthur straightens. So Gaius knows. He shouldn't be surprised but suddenly he wonders how many more traitors surround him.

"Told him?" asks Gaius.

"He... he said I could trust him..." it sounds like an accusation and Arthur finds his hands clenching in fists. How dare he, when he is the traitor!

"Merlin, you aren't making any sense." says Gaius patiently, eyebrow raised.

"I told him I had magic." blurts Merlin, his hands moving to clutch at the side of his face as he finally raises it to look at Gaius. His eyes are red, his eyes and nose running profusely. Arthur is almost too caught up in how wretched Merlin looks to notice the way that Gaius' face darkens.

"Merlin." His voice is low and stern and very serious. 

"I know I shouldn't have. But he was... he knew I had a secret. He said I could trust him. I thought..."

"You didn't think, my boy!" says Gaius, getting awkwardly to his feet, pushing on Merlin's shoulder.

"You don't understand!" moans Merlin.

"He loves me!" Arthur turns to him wide-eyed, but then Gaius turns on Merlin, his eyebrow raised so high even Arthur is worried. Merlin shrinks back a little.

"We... we are... we were lovers." Arthur's heart leaps to hear it. To hear that that was true. That it wasn't part of ruse to control or destroy him.

"I see." says Gaius and it's clear to Arthur that he disapproves.

"And in your infatuation you decided it wise to tell a man who has been brought up to hate magic, and who has lost both parents to magic," his voice is rising a little.   
"who has the power to execute you for whatever reason he wishes, that you have magic. Merlin, you fool. you love struck fool." says Gaius growing fond at the end. 

Merlin leans back despondently against the door and lets out a sob.

"How angry was he?" asks Gaius. Merlin's eyes close and over spills with tears and Gaius reaches a hand down to rub Merlin's shoulder. He lets him cry for a moment, the shakes Merlin's shoulder a little more forcefully.

"Merlin, I'm sorry my boy, but I think you need to go." says Gaius seriously. Merlin looks up, eyes wide. But then shakes his head.

"Merlin, you can't stay!"

"If Arthur wants me dead then..."

"No Merlin!" says Gaius indignantly. Arthur finds himself staring wide-eyed at Merlin. He's not sure why he's surprised. Merlin has thrown himself in mortal peril in front of Arthur's eyes before now. But to voluntarily wait for Arthur to kill him? His mind flashes back to moments before. When Merlin had stood and waited for Arthur to draw his sword on him. He feels sick.

"Merlin, look at me!" says Gaius severely. Merlin's eyes snap up.

"Don't you dare! I know you care for Arthur, but you are like a son to me! The only one I'll ever have! And think of your mother! And your friends!"

Merlin's head lowers in shame.

"You're always telling me that it's your destiny to protect Arthur. How can you protect him if you're dead?" says Gaius more quietly. Arthur frowns. Protect him? Merlin nods meekly, then clambers awkwardly to his feet and up the stairs to his chamber. Arthur is in shock, he can't move.

A few moments later Merlin emerges with a small bag. At the bottom of the stairs he embraces Gaius.

"Good luck my boy" he says, hugging him tightly.

"You too Gaius. I'll head to..."

"Don't... don't tell me, Merlin. What I don't know I can't be made to tell."

"Gaius I wouldn't...!" starts Arthur, forgetting in his shock that Gaius can't hear him.

"Be careful" finishes Gaius. Merlin nods and then walks quickly out of the room. Only then does Arthur snap fully out of his stupor.

"No! Merlin wait! I wouldn't! Please! Don't go! Merlin!" He shouts after Merlin as he walks quickly out into the evening and into the courtyard. Quickly Merlin heads over to the stables and saddles his horse before leading it out so that he can mount. All the while Arthur shouts and begs. He knows it's pointless, he knows Merlin can't hear him. But he must try something, do something. Because Merlin is going to ride away forever and Arthur won't know where he's gone and he can't bear it.

Merlin climbs onto his horse and sits for a moment in the saddle. When Arthur looks he can see that Merlin is looking at Arthur's window where a light still shines.

"Please Merlin, stay! I love you! I didn't mean it!" he sobs. Merlin's eyes widen, but they haven't moved for the window. Arthur glances up. The other Arthur is standing at the window, then disappears. Merlin's eyebrows shoot up and his eyes grow wide. He turns his horse then urges it on, dissappearing through the castle gates as Arthur screams after him.


	5. Chapter 5

Arthur wakes suddenly, sitting bolt upright. He shivering and a cold sweat shivers through him. He throws the covers from him and stands, running his fingers through his hair. Merlin is gone. Even now running from him. But in the starkness of being fully awake Arthur stills himself. That whole mirage was probably some magic induced fantasy meant to trick Arthur into accepting Merlin. Either that or he's so upset by Merlin's confession that his own mind has weaved the story. In thinking he paces and his eyes fall on the shattered remains of the jig. A niggling thought reminds him of his wish. Could that dream have been the answer. 

A soft clip clop of hooves on stone breaks through his thoughts and suddenly his blood is running cold again. He runs to the window hoping it's anyone else. It's dark but in the moonlight Arthur can make out Merlin sat sadly astride his horse. He sees him turn and look up at him. It's happening. Merlin is going to run. Arthur thanks his stars that he was so upset he hadn't bothered to change or even take his shoes off when he went to bed as he sprints down across the room and down the stairs. 

But by the time he makes it to the courtyard it is empty and he finds himself hurling Merlin's name fruitlessly into the darkness which surrounds him. He makes short work of saddling his own horse and rides as fast as he can through the castle gates and through the city. Outside of the city the dark seems to close in more. The world seems black and white. But on the road ahead, heading up a hill he thinks he can see Merlin's horse racing away. So he spurs his own on, desperate to catch him up. The rider in the distance disappears over the top of the hill and when Arthur reaches the brow of the hill the rider is out of sight. In the distance he can see a crossroads. Two roads disappear into woodland and there is no sign of him on the last road. Arthur feels his heart drop but rides on to the crossroads. There he dismounts, trying to determine which road Merlin took. But it's no use, the night is too dark and the path too stony to discern any hoof prints to follow. 

For a few moments Arthur stays as he is, sat on his own heels, seemingly studying the road, forcing himself not to cry. Then he gives up, looks between the two paths Merlin could have taken and remounts. By morning any tracks will have been overridden by the morning traffic into the city, but there is not thing he can do. Hanging his head he turns his horse to walk slowly home.

\---

The morning finds him knocking quietly at Gaius' chambers. Gaius opens the door slowly, his best poker face clearly in place.

"Sire?" 

Arthur wants to raise his eyebrow and sarcastically say he knows that Merlin isn't there. But he shouldn't know that Merlin isn't there. And he isn't there because of Arthur. And Arthur should be ashamed of that and Gaius should be angry. But he's hiding it because even he is scared of Arthur. Believes Arthur capable of killing him. So he tries to meet Gaius' eyes, with only partial success, and says 

"Can I come in?" he asks awkwardly. 

"Of course, Sire. Is something wrong?" he asks and Arthur thinks he shouldn't be surprised with how natural Gaius hides his emotions. Arthur steps in slowly. He feels like a naughty child being sent to apologise. It was never a feeling he's had much experience of. Maybe now he wishes he has. After a moment he turns to face Gaius, hands hanging awkwardly by his sides. 

"It's a... it's about Merlin." he says states.

"Merlin?" Gaius says, eyebrow raised exuding curiosity and mild concern. 

"Gaius, I know about Merlin's magic, and I know you know about it too." Gaius opens his mouth, then changes his mind and chooses to send Arthur a penetrating stare, eyebrow still firmly in place. It takes a moment for Arthur to realise that Gaius is waiting for him to speak. 

"He's left, hasn't he." says Arthur blankly. 

"Yes, sire" replies Gaius with just as little emotion.

"And he didn't tell you where he was going."

"No, Sire" confirms Gaius

"And he left because you feared I'd execute him" states Arthur 

"Yes, Sire....?" Gaius' reply becomes a question and his eyes search Arthur's.

"He was going to stay and just wait to be executed and you talked him into leaving." Arthur says, ignoring Gaius' suspicious looks. 

"I saw it, Gaius. I saw all of it, saw him run here and talk to you and leave, like it was a dream, or like I was a ghost following him. I don't know why or how. Might have been that jug, but that doesn't matter. Gaius, please, do you have any idea where he could have gone?"

For a long while Gaius just continues to watch Arthur. Then he straightens a little.

"I'm sorry, Arthur. I can't help you. If Merlin is sensible he'll be somewhere no one would think to look for him."

Arthur hangs his head, as the tears threaten to erupt again. Physically forcing himself to straighten up and counselling his features to hide his upset, Arthur glances up at Gaius.

"Thank you Gaius... and I'm sorry." with that he turns to leave.

"Sire?" Gaius says, halting Arthur.

"What did you mean by 'that jug'?"


	6. Chapter 6

Arthur stands sheepishly in Gaius' chambers, barely glancing at the piece of broken pottery that Gaius is inspecting on his workbench. 

"So this WAS a jug that a peasant gave you, saying it granted wishes?" says Gaius raising the infamous eyebrow. 

"Yes" says Arthur quietly. 

"And it's smashed to pieces because..." 

"Because I was angry at it." says Arthur, even though that sounds ridiculous, but it's the truth.

"You're angry at it?" says Gaius mostly hiding his incredulity.

"I wished to know what Merlin's secret was, and then Merlin was a sorcerer." says Arthur, frowning. 

"So you were angry at it for granting your wish." states Gaius, and said like that Arthur knows it sounds ridiculous but it makes more sense in his head. 

"So that was your last wish." states Gaius, carefully picking up the largest shard, which has the little handle still attached, and examining it carefully as if looking at a broken pot will point the way to Merlin. 

"Yes... No! No... I wished to know what Merlin was planning." says Arthur stepping forward to fiddle with the pieces of pottery. 

"Planning?" says Gaius, frowning. 

"He's a sorcerer. I assumed..." Gaius subtly rolls his eyes, but Arthur notices and stops talking. After a moment of silence in which Arthur just stares at the broken pot and Gaius stares at him.

"Sire, Merlin didn't have a plan." says Gaius seriously.

"Only keeping me alive." says Arthur. Gaius looks at him curiously. Arthur shakes himself. 

"It doesn't really matter that it's broken. I only got three wishes, and I'd used them all." says Arthur, slamming the piece he's holding down on the table. 

\---

While Gaius starts carefully gluing the small jug together in the vain hope that it will help, Arthur starts his first training session since Merlin disappeared. 

It feels wrong. He wants to be out hunting for Merlin, but he knows he must tread carefully. If anyone realises that Merlin is on the run because of magic his life could be in danger. If anyone realises that Arthur knows about Merlin's magic and isn't trying to arrest him then they will assume that Arthur is enchanted and not fit to rule. And yet if Arthur doesn't try to bring Merlin home then every one will wonder why, will know they've fought. As he fights his frustration out with Leon he tries to think of a reason why Merlin has gone. Maybe Merlin's mother is ill. No, Merlin would have told people. Maybe they have fought about something, but what? 

"Sire?" says Leon, as their fighting comes to an impasse, swords locked.

"What?" he spits out. 

"Has something happened, Sire? Something with Merlin?" 

"Had a lovers tiff?" jeers Gwaine from the sidelines. Leon sends him a warning glare. 

Arthur lets his anger and upset flow through and he manages to unbalance Leon, who ends up on his back. 

"That's none of your business." He spits and stalks inside. A lovers tiff is as good an excuse as any, because it's so close to the truth.

\---

It's been a month of slow, painstaking work but finally Gaius is finished. He has had to make glue, which is a disgusting process in and of itself, and then he's spent hours meticulously piecing together the little jar. His eyesight isn't what it was and he's been working around his patients, but it's finally finished. But as Gaius looks at it his heart sinks. After all that work the Jar still has a little chip in the top which Arthur must have missed when he was picking up the pieces. Even without that it's a mess, a beat broken, cheap piece of pot that looks not more magic than a pair of dirty old socks. Gaius' mouth twitches in annoyance. 

He picks it up, moving it around in his hands. Does he really want to bring Merlin back? Even if he could? Of course he misses Merlin. And Arthur certainly seems to be missing Merlin. Part of him suspiciously thinks this could all be some trick to lure Merlin back only to execute him. But Merlin believes in Arthur, and Arthur isn't his father. Taking a deep breath Gaius gently rubs the side of the jug and wishes Merlin home.


	7. Chapter 7

Arthur hears rumours of a sorcerer in a village a days ride from Camelot. He's described as young and dark-haired, which is enough to send Arthur's heart racing and he can't resist the urge to ride out. On the way he tries to think of what he will do. Try to take him aside? Arrest him, then declare him innocent? He doesn't know how much evidence there is against him. But he must find him a way. Somehow. 

\---

Merlin stands in Arthur's room, waiting. He's sneaked in, avoiding everyone. Gaius would kill him if he knew he were here. Arthur will probably have him killed when he arrives. But Merlin doesn't want to run and hide any more. And if Arthur is going to execute him, he thinks it better that he confronts Arthur face to face, like a man, than he is hunted down like an animal. So here he is. 

Arthur should be back from training any minute. For a few moments he stands doing nothing, then he starts fiddling with the bed sheets, straightening them out of habit. Hours pass and Arthur still hasn't arrived. And Merlin is tired after weeks on the run and Arthur's bed, in which he has spent so many nights, seems so inviting. Arthur will be even angrier if he finds Merlin sleeping in his bed, but he's probably going to have his head cut off anyway, so Merlin gives in to temptation and lies down on the bed. Within minutes he's asleep. 

\---

Arthur returns home late that night, weary and hopeless. The young, dark-haired sorcerer had turned out to be ten years old and the victim of a personal grudge against his father. Arthur had managed to straighten things out, but had left heart broken. He thought he was riding to bring Merlin home and he's returning empty handed. 

He enters his room exhausted, takes off his cloak and undoes his belt, leaning his sword against a chair. He just about manages to shrug off his chain mail alone. He's never had the heart to ask anyone else to help him replace Merlin. It never felt right. Rubbing his eyes he turns towards his bed. 

He stops dead. 

He's hallucinating, he must be. Because, there, lying on his bed, dressed in the clothes Arthur last saw him in, is Merlin. Arthur tentatively steps forward. Merlin's breathing is deep and even, he's curled up on his side, his knees tucked in tight. Tentatively Arthur reaches a hand forward and gently touches his face. He's solid beneath Arthur's touch and Arthur drops to his knees beside the bed. Biting his lip Arthur gently runs his fingers through Merlin's hair. Tears flow down Arthur's cheeks, but they're tears of relief; Merlin is back. He thinks about waking him, but Merlin looks so tired and so peaceful that Arthur can't bear to. 

He gets up and quickly undresses himself until he's just in his small trousers and shirt. Merlin is still fully dressed and Arthur gently pulls Merlin up to sitting. For a moment Merlin stirs and mutters in his sleep, but then his head lolls against Arthur's and Arthur signs happily and kisses the side of Merlin's head. Very carefully he peels Merlin's jacket off and undoes his neckerchief, not helped by the way Merlin's head keeps falling forwards against his chest. But he manages, and then lays Merlin back down on the bed. He takes off Merlin's belt, but has rather more difficulty with his boots, which are wet and moulded to his feet. But he gets them off. The whiff from them after all this time is quite offensive, so he throws them as far from the bed as he can manage. Then he has to try lifting Merlin again, so that he can pull the bed cover from under him, then pull it over to cover him again. Then he climbs into the bed himself on the other side. For a few moments he lies there, less than a foot from Merlin. But it seems to far. Arthur doesn't know what the morning will bring, what Merlin will say or do, but right now Merlin is here and safe, so he wraps his arms around Merlin's waist, buries his nose into Merlin's hair and soon falls asleep.

\---

When Merlin wakes the first thing he thinks is that he's in Arthur's room and it's morning. And then he realises there's a weight around his middle, and he's actually in the bed, not just on it, and he hasn't got any shoes on, or his coat and he sits up confused and then turns around carefully. The arm now falling away from his middle is attached to a sleeping Arthur, who now frowns and blinks as he wakes. For a moment Merlin is still, waiting. Then Arthur's eyes focus. And he smiles and reaches up a hand to caress Merlin's cheek. 

"You came back." he says quietly, happily. 

Merlin could cry with joy and relief, but he just nods and smiles, blink back the tears. 

"I thought I'd never see you again." says Arthur, sitting up and his hand moving into Merlin's hair.

"Can't get rid of me that easily." jokes Merlin, smiling half-heartedly. Arthur leans forward and kisses, pressing their lips together for a long moment, then pulls away. Merlin's face crumples a little and Arthur thinks he's done something wrong until Merlin surges forward, wrapping his arms around Arthur's middle and burying his face in the crook of Arthur's neck. His grip is vice-like and his breath against Arthur's neck is deep and uneven. So Arthur wraps his own arms around Merlin. He kisses his head over and over, finding himself rocking slightly and muttering soothing nothings as Merlin's uneven breathing becomes actual sobs. 

Eventually the sobs subside and Merlin's grip on Arthur's shirt loosens. He's lying in Arthur's arms sniffing every now and then and letting Arthur gently caress his arm.

"Merlin?" 

"Yes."

"I'm sorry." says Arthur quietly. 

"I know." says Merlin.

"Merlin?" 

"Yes."

"I love you." This time there is no reply, although Merlin's grip on his shirt tightens and Arthur thinks he feels tears seep through his shirt. 

"Do you know that, Merlin?" For a moment there is nothing, then Merlin's pushing himself up to look down at Arthur. His eyes are glistening and wide. But then his smile turns bright and wide.


End file.
